Brian’s world in week 2
We already had an oral which i think went well. It was on “Riders to the Sea” by John Millington Synge and we had to do a 5 minute presentation on how we would stage the play. I was probably the closest to the actual time limit, but i wasn’t as chock full of information as, oh let’s say, Shay. I didn’t go until today (8/29/07) so i had more time to actually listen to what other people wanted to do. I think most of them were staying in a safe realm of realism, but i really appreciate the idea of expressionism and surrealism. I love to create my set designs allong those kinds of lines. I think it’s better to do realism when your doing film, theatre you have a bigger creative realm as far as keeping it on a stage and having to get your point across in an hour and a half without a rewind button. It takes more cahones. Luckily I, Sir Boitano, have much cahones and i think i pulled it off. I was nervous about my costume designs cause i HATE fashion and i’m always scared that i’m going to screw it up and then find out later that an empire waist line is a symbol of innocence, and low cut is symbol of power or something crazy like that. I’ll just stick to what i know… Over all, my presentation was not as good as the other ones, but it was actually within the time limit which was what no-one else did, so i did accomplish something. I think for my next oral i need to delve a bit more into the underlying tones of the author and bring them forth. It’s my job as a director to make everything obvious and be able to let the audience leave the theatre knowing exactly what i meant. Coming up next in class are our actual scenes from Rider and i will be playing the lead role of “Bartley.” We don’t have any other information as to what we need to do as far as off-books, but i’m on top of my lines. More excitedly, is “Moby Dick the Musical.” For the sake of everyone in drama, i did not apply to be stagemanager. But looking back on my experiences here at spruce creek, i’ve done almost everything there could possibly be backstage/tech booth, but i have never acted. It’s not that i never wanted to, but it’s that i don’t think i’ve ever got the opportunity. I know that i can in the very least try, i have had good scenes in class, and i think comedy is my forte. The thing is, i never seem to be given the chance. I’ve been dying for an acting role since i was a freshman, and now i’m a senior and still standing infront of the entire drama club with nearly nothing on my acting resume. It’s not that i feel like a hypocrit, but more like a student who’s not well rounded. Of course we get to act in class, but it’s different to get out infront of a paying audience and give them a real performence. Unfortunatly, it’s been extremely discouraging. Everytime i’m not cast in something i will get really down and promise to never audition for anything again because i apparently can’t fit any role, or i’m not good enough for any part, or i’m not pretty enough, thin enough, or talented. I know rejection is a part of theatre and it’s something you have to cope with. But after not being cast so many times, it really takes a toll on your self esteem. But not only that–if i audition for something outside spruce creek i have a whole resume less than everyone else who’s competing for the same part. Now i know what you’re thinking, “Brian? Not completely satisfied wiht himself?!?! WHAT?!?!” Yes, i know, but we’ve all been there people. I guess what i need to do this year is learn how to finally cope with what happens without hating life, and still audition even while thinking i don’t have a chance in hell. So i’ll focus on that and Stanislavski technique–both are key.
